How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?
Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?
Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!
Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
Rottweiler: Make me.
Shih-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. I have servants to take care of that...
Lab: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let ME change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I?
Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, checked to make sure I haven't missed any, and made just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.
Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.
Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.
Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got a terrible hangover.
Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there!
Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
Australian Shepherd: First I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?
Schnauzer: Bark bark bark. Mom, the lightbulb is out...bark bark bark bark...MOM! I said the lightbulb is out! Bark bark bark bark bark...MOM!!! WHAT PART OF THAT DIDN'T YOU HEAR? I MEAN HELLO????
Hound: ZZZZZzzzz. Love you Abigail...